MOVIE REVIEW: THE DARKEST HOUR (Chris Gorak, 2011)

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It was a pity that someone as talented as Emile Hirsch got wasted in this worthless movie. It was the type of horror flick populated by characters that did the stupidest things just to generate cheap scares. Everything about this movie was pointless. To say more would be another waste of my time.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

MOVIE REVIEW: DAMSELS IN DISTRESS (Whit Stillman, 2011)

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It was trying to be a geeky version of Mean Girls and although there were some funny moments, the movie wasn’t really good as a whole.

Greta Gerwig and the rest of the girls were fine but they weren’t allowed to do more than what their stereotypical roles required.

And please don’t get me started on that dancing. There should be a rule that dancing should not be allowed at the end of movies unless it’s a dance movie, a musical, Bollywood-inspired, or a product of Regal Films.

Rating: 2/5

MOVIE REVIEW: CORIOLANUS (Ralph Fiennes, 2011)

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I hadn’t read the play that this movie was based on and after watching this, I guess I’d never get myself to doing it.

The film was set in the modern times with characters that spoke like they were in a theater (yes, they talked in Shakespearean verses) and I didn’t really get the point of this combination. It was just hard to hear people converse like that unless they were wearing tights or balloon skirts. I had more fun counting the people that walked out of the cinema.

The best things about this film were the actors and their performances. Ralph Fiennes will forever be Voldemort to me and he didn’t disappoint here. The stand-out though was Vanessa Redgrave who gave a chilling performance as a ferocious mother (reminiscent me of Jacki Weaver in Animal Kingdom). Brian Cox and Jessica Chastain rounded up the strong supporting cast.

And then there was Gerard Butler, who looked lost in all the dialogue, ready to declare war on his agent.

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

MOVIE REVIEW: BREAKING WIND (Craig Moss, 2011)


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And I thought Vampires Suck was awful.

Yet another tired parody on a lame movie (sorry, Twihards), one could only expect groan-worthy fart scenes here (if the title wasn’t a giveaway). Weirdly enough, most of the jokes were from Eclipse and only the last few scenes referenced Breaking Dawn. Even the end credits showed that the original title was Fully Mooned the Movie. Still wasn’t funny, though.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

MOVIE REVIEW: BEGINNERS (Mike Mills, 2011)

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I feel like I’ve aged like Christopher Plummer by the end of the movie. Man, that was a tough one to sit through.

Such a shame since Plummer and Ewan McGregor were so into their characters. It would have been more interesting if the movie focused on the father’s story instead of the tacked-on love angle of son and girlfriend.

And are old gay men supposed to wear neckerchiefs to show their sexual preference? It reminded so much of Robert Arevalo’s Papang in Magkaribal.

Rating: ★★☆☆☆