MOVIE REVIEW: CAMPUS CRUSH (Crisaldo Pablo, 2009)

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Signs that you’re probably watching a local queer B-movie (which, let’s admit it, has its own special place in Philippine cinema):

• The boys in the swim team wearing oh-so-skimpy trunks like they were stage-ready for their production of Total Eclipse of the Heart in White Bird

• A public shower room scene where three swimmers would rather share one spout while rubbing their really wet bodies

• Cute cotton candy pink school uniforms for guys, approved by Britney Spears

• The iconic Chamyto Aguedan

• Copious amounts of male frontal nudity (that weirdly reminded me of Pampanga’s Best) and gratuitous sex in the most unexpected places (e.g. utility room next to cans of Boysen paint)

• Sample dialogue: “Gwapo ka pero pokpok ka!!”

• La La Fish Crackers product placement

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

TOP 10 MMFF MOVIES (2000-2016)

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