IT: CHAPTER TWO (Andy Muschietti, 2019)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

If you’re a huge Marvel fan, I’m sure alam mo yung feeling na halos mabaliw ka sa tuwa whenever you spot that Stan Lee cameo in every movie. Ganung level ang saya ko nung biglang lumabas si Stephen King as a shop owner who hated books with badly-written endings (wink, wink).

Mahirap talaga ma-capture ang lahat ng details of a King novel pero this was a pretty faithful adaptation. Hindi naman talaga siya outright clown horror story kaya na-appreciate ko na mas maraming fantasy elements this time around (including that Ritual of Chüd).

Standout sa adult cast si Bill Hader. Ang ganda ng ginawa nilang “change” sa character niyang si Richie. Mas nag-resonate yung brutal hate crime sa start ng movie (lalo na ngayon na ang daming bigots online).

Hindi naman problem ang three hour (almost six for both chapters) runtime considering na more than 1k pages ang libro pero ramdam pa rin ang pacing issues. Mas effective din yung horror element (plus nostalgia) nung mga bata sa first movie.

Iba talaga ang source of fears and nightmares nung childhood, no? Ngayong adult ka na, walang laban ang isang clown sa iyong latest Meralco bill.

Rating: ★★★☆☆

BUYBUST (Erik Matti, 2018)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

So in the end, the movie basically mocked the “Nanlaban” defense and yet served it as a source of entertainment where the PDEA had every reason to kill the poor because majority of them were addicts and/or drug protectors? I didn’t get this contradiction.

I love my BFF Anne, but she was terribly miscast in this role. In one scene, she shrieked “Gooooo!” like she was storming a meet and greet with Gong Yoo. She just lacked the grit (angas?) needed by her character and it was even more blatant whenever a cornrowed Mara Lopez (in the Michelle Rodriguez role) was onscreen. Siya ang totoong astig.

Commendable production values (the one take fight scene and the final rooftop shot were good), but I just couldn’t get over the neon-lit slums. Magkano kaya Meralco bill nila?

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

(Originally published August 3, 2018.)

SEVENTH SON (Sergei Bodrov, 2014)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

My notes on Seventh Son:

1. The movie opened with Jeff Bridges playing a drunk Gandalf talking with his mouth full and giving a whole new meaning to scenery-chewing. I hope the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences voters never have the time to see this terrible performance.

2. Speaking of the Oscars, I was just happy to see that this won’t be shown in the US until February. Julianne Moore’s work here wasn’t the stuff of a future Oscar winner. This was way below Norbit levels.

3. I want that instant rejuvenation spell. I wonder if it’s on Belo Medical’s list of services.

4. Twenty minutes into the movie and I still had no idea what was happening. There was mention of a spook, something about a blood moon, and the seventh son of the seventh son, but all I cared about was the charred body of Jon Snow.

5. Those blood cakes combined the best of both worlds: it was simply puto made of dinuguan. Yum!!

6. Oh, so Gandalf was also Mr. Miyagi with a Medieval Irish accent.

7. A character was given an ogre scrotum for his enjoyment. Now I understand why they walk really funny.

8. Apparently, there would be a literal spark (and blue for that matter) when two people were destined to be together. We kept seeing the literal spark but the bland young actors actually didn’t have any. I wished for Lorna Tolentino to suddenly enter the scene in full racist Chinese eye make-up and scream, “Ano kayo Meralco? Kelangan may spark?”

9. I laughed so hard during the final scene when our hero flipped his hood, the music swelled, the screen faded to black, and it hinted at a possible sequel.

10. For whatever it’s worth, at least it was no Season of the Witch.

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

(Originally published January 10, 2015.)