MOVIE REVIEW: US AGAIN (Joy Aquino, 2020)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

Ngayon ko lang na-realize na marami palang tao ang may galit sa akin. Hindi ko alam bakit tuwang-tuwa sila na i-recommend ito kahit obvious naman na napakaikli na ng buhay natin dahil sa COVID.

Anyway, so eto na nga nagsayang ako ng Sunday morning para manuod ng isa na namang ghost story. Yes, yun ang plot twist ng movie kaya huwag n’yo na panoorin (I saved more than an hour of your life and a possible visit to the optometrist dahil sa weird choice to use shaky cam dito; you can thank me later). Bakit ba nauso itong multo-multuhan genre sa atin? Hindi pa nga bumababa yung tumaas na suka (as in vomit, not Datu Puti) sa lalamunan ko pagkatapos ng Hindi Tayo Pwede at Love the Way U Lie eh meron na naman bago.

Sayang kasi magaling pa naman umarte sina RK Bagatsing (Mike) at Jane Oineza (Marge). Feeling ko mag-root ako sa love team nila in a far different movie. Pero dito, simula pa lang na lumabas sila na naka-floral couple shirt eh gusto ko na sila agad maghiwalay. Ang toxic ng relationship nila! Hindi ko nga natiis ang awayan ng favorite local couple ko na sina Popoy at Basha sa A Second Chance eh sila pa kaya na naging mag-jowa after ahasin ni Marge si Mike sa long-term gf nito (na bff ni Marge btw). Sorry girl, karma ang tawag diyan.

Nakakalungkot talaga ang state ng healthcare dito sa atin as seen through films. Kung sa Edward ipinakita ang realidad ng kakulangan ng basic facilities for the sick, dito naman ipinakita ang incompetence ng medical industry. Nakaka-bwiset yung isang med tech na puro landi ang inaatupag sa trabaho kaya napagpalit yung urine samples. Tapos yung supervisor ni Marge sabi na the facility can get sued because of what happened pero siya pa rin ang pinag-ayos ng gulo. Wala kayong legal department??

Side note: Ang pinaka-nakakainis na character dito ay yung nanay na nagpa-BP at nung nasaktan eh saka nagreklamo at sinabing kukunin lang naman niya ang x-ray result ng anak niya. Pakibigyan nga si nanay ng reseta for Ensure Gold at isang kilong mani (as in peanuts, hindi yung… alam n’yo na yun).

Anyway ulit, so may pa-plot twist nga sa dulo na kaluluwa ni Mike (na comatose) yung nagpapakita kay Marge. Kahit sobrang obvious naman agad simula nung lumabas siya suot ang white polo na laba sa Tide (huy P&G, ilang beses ko na kayo na-promote ha, send nudes). At di ba nagtataka si Marge na lahat ng tao ang weird ng reaction kapag may kinakausap siya (lalo na yung waiter na nag-take ng order niya for two; although to be fair ganun din naman ang itsura nung judgmental na cashier sa KFC whenever I give my usual order)?

Pero siguro ito talaga ang isa sa mga ultimate nightmares, no? Imagine bwiset na bwiset ka na sa ex mo at gusto mo na maka-move on tapos mumultuhin ka pa ng gago. Sabi ko nga sa’yo Marge na Carmi Martin is just around the corner.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

MOVIE REVIEW: HINDI TAYO PWEDE (Joel Lamangan, 2020)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

My notes on Hindi Tayo Pwede:

1. Minsan napapaisip na lang ako kung seryoso ang Viva Films kapag sinasabi nito sa start ng mga pelikula niya na “Proudly Presents”. Kasi nung natapos ko panoorin ang kababalaghan na ‘to, considering na attached ang mga pangalan ng Philippine Cinema luminaries like Direk Joel Lamangan and Sir Ricky Lee sa project, nagtaka talaga ako kung saang part sila proud.

Napakalayo nito from being a future classic tulad ng City After Dark at Maynila Sa Mga Kuko ng Liwanag na nakapaskil ang posters sa kwarto ni Gabby (Lovi Poe). Apparently as a frustrated director slash writer, may taste siya sa local films kaya rin kasama ang mga larawan ng The Flor Contemplacion Story at Himala. Gusto ko yung lantarang pagbubuhat ng Lamangan/Lee tandem ng sariling bangko (check n’yo na lang ang credits ng dalawang pelikula sa IMDB).

2. First scene pa lang ni Lovi lumabas na agad siya na naka-(Bench Body?) underwear kasi alam ng filmmakers kung ano ang totoong selling point ng gawa nila (eh diba nga naka-topless yung tatlong bida sa movie poster with a promised threesome?). Hindi naman nagpatalo sina Tony Labrusca (as the boyfriend Gabriel, yes Gabby din oha destiny!) at Marco Gumabao (as the lovesick ”Besh” Dennis, as in Roldan). Paiksian ng swimming shorts at palakihan ng bukol ang labanan every time merong requisite pool scene (syempre!) at beach scene (syempre!).

Ang lakas ng tawa ko nung ni-top ni Lovi si Tony dun sa sex scene nila set to their theme song Never Ever Say Goodbye by Nonoy Zuñiga. Why that song choice ba? Hindi naman sila couple in their 60’s. At diba popular funeral song na ‘to?

3. Sabagay apt din pala ang kanta kasi patay na si Gabriel dito. Yup, hindi lang nasobrahan ng Mena cream si Tony sa poster.

(Side note: Grabe makasira ng mood ang direction dito. Pano yung sex scene na sinabi ko biglang naputol bago pa umabot sa chorus kaya ako na lang ang kumanta kahit ibang eksena na.)

4. Bago ang story kung hindi mo napanood ang early 90’s film na Ghost with Demi Moore and the late Patrick Swayze. Garapalan ang reference kaya meron din Oda Mae Brown dito in the form of a manghuhula named Madam Concha (played by the Vangie Labalan). Kabog si Ateng Whoopi Goldberg!!

Ang difference lang talaga ay directly nahahawakan at nakakausap ni Gabby si Gabriel na hindi na kelangan pa sumanib kay Madam Concha. I guess wise decision na rin siya kasi ayaw ko naman ata ng love scene between Lovi and Ms. Vangieeeeee.

5. Feeling ko naubusan ng budget for the visual effects (o nakalimutan na tuluyan ng director ang premise) kasi obviously gumagalaw naman ang mga bagay na nadidikitan ni Gabriel (like yung upuan at door tassels pag-walk out niya sa cubicle ni Madam Concha). Nasayang lang yung pag-emote nung isang extra na “Ooh ang lamig naman dito malakas ba ang aircon?”.

6. Favorite line ko yung kay Phoemela Barranda as an ad agency executive: “Bakit ang cheesy ng presentation mo? Cheese ba ang produkto?” (Gahd! Nasaan ang creativity boss? Bakit hindi na lang pizza or mac and cheese or sana ginawa mo man lang cheese platter diba?)

Second favorite ko yung exchange na ito…

Gabby to Dennis’ new jowa: “Nasungkit mo ang best friend ko!”

Dennis (feeling hurt): “Ginawa mo naman akong santol.”

(Yes Marco, we objectify you as a santol. At bakit ba laging nagmamakaawa ang characters niya na mahalin siya eh sure naman ako ang daming nakapila diyan?)

7. Bakit yung laging palabas sa sinehan nila eh mga lumang movies like Ate Shawie’s Ikaw? Naguluhan tuloy ako kung set ba sa 90’s ang pelikula. Kaya ba naka-tangga cut na bikini si Lovi nung umahon sa beach? Kaso modern naman ang surroundings like yung sa Citadines? Or may time jumps ba ako na na-miss kakatawa sa upuan ko?

And speaking of cinema, sana walang gumaya kay Gabriel who lacked basic theater etiquette at nag-propose talaga sa gitna ng isang screening. Kapag merong gumawa ng stunt na ito habang nanunuod ako ng A Quiet Place 2, sinasabi ko talaga merong bride na ikakasal with a missing ring finger.

8. “Dun lang namin na-realize na nakikita at nahahawakan ko lang si Gabriel dahil sa pagmamahal ko sa kanya. At ngayon na unti-unti nawawala ang pagmamahal na yun, unti-unti na din sya nawawala.”

Buti may explanation sa dulo kasi akala ko talaga nasobrahan lang ng Tide yung white shirt ni Gabriel.

9. Ipinakita sa ending na buntis si Gabby habang nakatayo sa puntod ni Gabriel. Kay Dennis ba yun or ghost baby nila ni Gabriel? I need answers pero ayoko na magbayad for a sequel huhu!

10. According to Sir Ricky (na uulitin ko, siya ang sumulat nito kaloka!), kalahati daw ng populasyon sa Pilipinas ay hindi pa nakaka-move on. Jusko kaya pala naghihirap ang bansa natin kasi puro lovelife ang inaatupag. Kaya din siguro hindi nauubos ang hugot films tulad nito.

Sabi nga ni Gabriel, “This is exactly why I hate Tagalog movies. Ang babaduy!”. Uhm… Let’s just say na nung nagtulak ng basurahan ang maintenance pagkatapos ng screening, akala ko kokolektahin din niya ang pelikulang ‘to.

P.S. Sorry walang threesome. Masakit talaga na pinagtagpo sina Tony at Marco pero di tinadhana.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

MOVIE REVIEW: JOHN DENVER TRENDING (Arden Rod Condez, 2019)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

My notes on John Denver Trending:

1. Kumusta na kaya si Amalayer Girl? Nung 2012 pa pala nag-viral yung video niya ng paninigaw sa isang security guard sa LRT Santolan station. Alala ko noon na ang daming bwiset na bwiset sa kanya (kabilang na ako). Siguro kasi iniisip natin kadalasan na maarte kapag pa-English English ang isang Pinoy. O siguro kasi ang feeling natin sa kanya eh mababa ang tingin niya sa mga blue-collar workers. O kaya kasi mahilig lang tayo mang-down ng ibang tao to make us feel better about ourselves. Yung lagi tayong tama, mabuti at busilak ang kalooban at yung mga nasa viral videos na yan eh deserve ang bullying kasi masasama ang ugali.

Napakadali para sa atin mag-judge ng iba habang nakatago sa harap ng mga computer at phone screens. Attack agad lahat ng keyboard warriors (aka toxic kuyog culture) kahit di pa alam kung ano ang totoong story. Puro mura, puro pintas, minsan may death threats pa na kasama di lamang sa taong involved kundi pati sa pamilya nito. Nakakalungkot na ganito tayo ngayon sa panahon ng social media.

(And sobrang hypocritical lang na ang sunod na posts ng iba eh Bible quotes or suicide prevention hotlines. Puh-lease!)

2. Medyo similar ang nangyari kay Amalayer at sa bida dito na si John Denver (Jansen Magpusao). Pinagbintangan siya ng mga kaklase niya na nagnakaw ng iPad pero ang nahagip lang ng video eh nung binubugbog na niya ang kanyang classmate. In-upload ng isang mokong sa Facebook (“PASIKATIN NATIN ANG GAGONG TO… LIKE AND SHARE HANGGANG UMABOT KAY TATAY DIGONG!”) bago tuluyang mag-viral. Umikot ang buong pelikula sa epekto ng cyberbullying kay John Denver at kung paano nito sinira ang buhay niya at ng kanyang pamilya.

3. Malinis ang pagkakalahad ng story. Nagustuhan ko na kahit ang daming not-so-subtle hints na hindi siya ang nagnakaw (yung charger na lang ang naiwan sa classroom nung pumasok siya, yung bag niya na hinalughog, yung mga construction workers na padaan-daan sa mga eksena), bilang manonood mapapaisip ka pa rin hanggang dulo kung kinuha ba niya talaga ang lecheng iPad na yan.

Lumabas ang pagiging judgmental ko lalo na at hindi naman siya ulirang kabataan. Napaka-flawed ng character niya (ang lakas ng tawa ko nung inalaska niya ang isang classmate na hindi naman memorized ang Lord’s Prayer) kaya may second thoughts pa rin kung maaawa ka sa pinagdaraanan niya.

4. Inspired ang casting kay Jansen lalo na at hindi siya trained actor. Bumagay yung rawness ng performance niya dun sa innocence ng character. Ang lakas ng star quality niya sa big screen. May ilang eksena lamang na medyo pilit ang emosyon (para sa akin kinulang siya dun sa crucial scene na tinakpan niya ang mukha niya para humagulgol) pero bawing-bawi kapag natural lang ang batuhan niya ng mga linya with his mother (Meryll Soriano). Yung itsura nung mukha niya dun sa ilog pagkatapos dumugo ang ulo ng nanay niya, sobrang sakit sa loob panoorin. Ramdam yung guilt sa lahat ng nangyayari kaya di nakakagulat yung choice niya sa dulo.

5. Pero grabe halimaw din si Meryll sa actingan. Sa sobrang huge fan ako ni Maricel Soriano eh napaisip talaga ako dito kung mas magaling pa siya sa auntie niya. Nung andun sila sa principal’s office tapos sinabi niya yung line na parang “Eh bakit kayo naman, sir. Kung sabihin ko na may shabu ang brief n’yo, ibababa nyo ba?” gusto ko mag-standing ovation sa sinehan. At nung sinabi sa kanya na may record ng violations (including theft) ang anak niya na di niya alam, para akong si John Denver na gusto ko na lang matunaw sa kinauupuan ko. Ultimo pagpunas niya lang ng pawis sa mukha after pagsasampalin ang anak eh sobrang nuanced. Napakahusay!!

Ang minor quibble ko lang ay yung spotty accent niya. Although na-explain naman na hindi siya tubong Antique, ang obvious lang kasi nung disconnect ng pagsasalita niya sa kanyang anak. May isang beses pa na nahaluan niya ng “so” ang sinasabi niya kaya medyo na-distract ako sa eksena kasi out of character.

6. Wala lang yun sa dami ng scenes na tumagos talaga sa puso ko (meaning more ngawa ako diba) lalo na kapag naka-focus sa simple moments nilang mag-ina. Naiiyak pa rin ako kapag naiisip yung part na sinubuan niya ng flower icing ang nanay niya matapos siya tawaging “animal!” (ang ganda ng pasok ng haunting score dito huhu). Bulakbol siya pero sweet naman pala. A few seconds lang pero ang daming sinabi tungkol sa kanila at sa kanilang relationship.

Pati yung tahimik silang naglalakad sa may dalampasigan tapos bakas sa mukha ni nanay yung frustration, embarrassment, at disappointment pero mahal na mahal pa rin nya ang anak niya kaya nasasaktan siya para dito. Durog na durog ako dun.

7. Maganda yung paggamit ng symbolisms dito. Yung mantsa sa uniform niya na kahit anong kuskos niya ay hindi matanggal. Parang Scarlet Letter lang na naka-tattoo sa noo niya na nagsusumigaw na “MAGNANAKAW!”. Yung kahit anong explain at defend niya sa sarili eh wala naman naniniwala at tuluyan nang nabahiran ang reputasyon at buong pagkatao niya. Tapos nung flag ceremony siya lang talaga ang namumukod-tangi na hindi gumamit ng Tide kaya nag-stand out ang naninilaw niya na suot.

Maganda rin yung juxtaposition na ginamit sa power of chismis lalo na dun sa kapitbahay na sinasabing aswang. Minsan mas malala pa sa bala ng baril ang mga salitang lumalabas sa isip at bunganga ng mga tao.

8. Nakakangalit yung entire investigation process ng mga pulis. Naalala ko tuloy yung isang eksena sa Pamilya Ordinaryo na tungkol din sa police brutality. Grabe yung feeling ng helplessness kapag talaga person in authority ang nang-ha-harass sa isang tao. Nakakatakot kapag naka-uniporme ang demonyo.

9. Sa dami ng eksenang naglalakad siya, ang ganda nung biglang tumakbo si John Denver off-path. Malaman. Kaya siguro sobrang polarizing din ng ending nito. For me, justified naman siya sa context ng theme. Hindi siya nagmukhang cop-out. Mas nag-resonate pa nga ang perils ng social media dahil sa powerful scene na yun. Kapag ramdam mo na sobrang squirmish ang mga katabi mo sa sinehan dahil sa pinapanood nila, alam mo na malakas ang effect nito. Hindi nila makakalimutan ang nakita. Para na rin niyang sinabi na in essence, lahat tayo ay guilty sa pagpatay kay John Denver.

10. Yung isa sa pinaka-paborito kong eksena sa Philippine Cinema 2019 ay nung tahimik na kumakain ang pamilya nila ng Cloud 9 sa pilapil. Malayo sa gulo ng mundo, hiwalay sa ingay ng social media. Sa panahong ito ng Digital Age, hindi kaya yan ang pinakamainam para sa ating lahat?

Rating: ★★★★★

MOVIE REVIEW: MIDSOMMAR (Ari Aster, 2019)

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SPOILER ALERT!!

My notes on Midsommar:

1. Let me preface this by stating that I would never recommend this film to just about anyone. My high rating wasn’t really a reflection of its overall quality. Rather, it spoke more about the perverse pleasure that I had watching old people’s faces smashed to smithereens or the silly thought that a horny teenage girl used her pubic hair trimmings as a vital ingredient to a love elixir (or better put, organic gayuma that would put all those Quiapo-made ones to shame).

Pretty sure a good number of you might find this misadvertised (?) horror movie reaaaaally slow and excruciatingly boring (even worse, lacking a decent payoff). I should know, I felt the exact same grief with Ari Aster’s feature length debut film Hereditary and its snail-paced two hours (plus knockoff Paranormal Activity 3 ending). You had been properly warned.

2. I mentioned before that Get Out gave me that creepy Shake, Rattle & Roll II: Aswang vibe where Daniel Kaluuya’s character Chris resembled the offering of the month Portia, played by local horror princess Manilyn Reynes. Well this one took it to a whole new level by increasing the number of Portias and cranking up the overall weirdness (and this coming from someone who had seen both versions of Wicker Man).

I had never been this scared of villagers wearing all-white outfits (imagine the boxes of Tide that they consumed!!) and faint, chanting sounds that would never be part of my ASMR nightly playlist. Because of this movie, Sweden definitely dropped to the bottom of my travel checklist, just a little above Slovakia (no thanks to you Hostel!!).

3. There were several moments here that required suspension of disbelief because nobody in their right minds would see a body freefall from a cliff and not run as far away as possible from that crime scene (no, not even if one would win a Pulitzer for Anthropology by writing about that cultish ritual). And who wouldn’t question the type of meat pies that were being served to them, especially one that had a golden pube? (This reminded me again of another Manilyn classic, the Zombies episode of Mga Kuwento ni Lola Basyang where they got served a special soup filled with hair, nails, and ultimately “MATAAAAAA!!”).

Why didn’t these people ever feel the need to… wait for it, get out?!

4. Still, the most disturbing bits for me were the ones where Dani Gurl (Florence Pugh) suffered from panic attacks caused by the trauma of her bipolar sister killing their entire family (the sight of the sister with that exhaust tube taped around her mouth was the stuff of nightmares).

One of my favorite scenes was this smooth transition of Dani exiting the living room and ending up hyperventilating in the plane’s lavatory (my other favorite was that disorienting upside down shot of the car traversing the country road, reminiscent of Martin Scorsese’s Bringing Out the Dead).

Pugh’s a terrific actress and effortlessly made me feel the pain that she was going through. Seriously, I needed some high-grade Ativan as well to calm me down after her breakdowns. 

(Although I did find it weird that Dani experienced a lot of grisly stuff yet only threw up when she witnessed her “cheating” boyfriend. Iba talaga ang effect ng pag-ibig.)

5. Happy to see The Good Place’s Chidi (William Jackson Harper) playing a variation of his geeky TV persona on the big screen. Wait, he wasn’t too smart in this one pala considering where his character (and leg) ended up.

6. When one of the elders used the tambyolo to pick out the village’s other 90-year offering, was it a direct reference to Shirley Jackson’s The Lottery?

7. Moral of the story: Always treat your partner right or you might end up drugged inside a hollowed-out bear while burning in a cult’s yellow temple. You had been warned, Gerald Anderson.

Rating: ★★★★☆

MOVIE REVIEW: PATINTERO: ANG ALAMAT NI MENG PATALO (Mihk Vergara, 2015)

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My notes on Patintero: Ang Alamat ni Meng Patalo:

1. “Sa patintero, mananalo raw ang pinakamabilis tumakbo. Pero ang totoo, mananalo ang pinakamatatag ang puso.”

I was immediately transported back to the early 90’s pre-videogame, pre-Facebook era when kids like my reed-thin old self played real games (and by real, I meant sweaty running in the dirt until my Tide-white school polo shirt had turned the color of my favorite Serg’s chocolates).

Lunch was my favorite time of the day with every minute spent on the patintero grounds of Zobel. I hated losing because it meant crawling under this long line of legs of classmates that would be jeering and using the forbidden (and humiliating) “S” word known to a young boy: SUPOT.

2. The nostalgia factor alone was enough to make me like this movie. My heart could not contain its excitement when the basic rules of the game were discussed: doble balik, no touchback, no double team. Even seeing the old two-peso decagon coin brought back a lot of good memories.

3. Given such an interesting premise, I wish the movie stuck to being a film made for children, instead of catering to the children at heart. Similar to the excellent RPG: Metanoia, it could have been a great way to show the kids today how things were prior to DOTA.

I was actually surprised with the G rating given the comic violence and profanity (mostly from the kid actors). The animated sequences were great (a heightened depiction of the game’s action) but did we really have to see the kids punching and hitting each other in reality?

My inner prude even groaned a bit in the scenes where our underdog heroine raised her middle finger to her hecklers, uttered the word “Pakshet!”, and rallied her team by saying “Talunin na natin ang mga gagong yan”. (Please don’t say, “Well, that’s reality” because it will just make me even sadder.)

4. Were the animated fight sequences inspired by Kung Fu Hustle? I actually expected the Auntie played by Suzette Ranillo to show up with hair rollers since she already had the cigarette down pat.

5. I was really bothered when they started the game with missing players. Any patintero fanatic would know that you couldn’t play with uneven teams. I mean that was usually how I got to play: out of lack of choice during a schoolyard pick or it would be a default.

6. My favorite dialogue in the movie:

Kid 1: “Candy?”
Kid 2: (shakes head) “Nag-quit na ako.”

My second favorite:

Bully: “Bakit hindi perfect ang ginawa mong assignment namin?”
Geek: “Sino naman maniniwala na makaka-perfect kayo?”

7. The movie needed a stronger narrative (especially with the free fishballs and sudden character changes in the end), but all was forgiven with that Maselang Bahaghari move that made me tear up a bit. Now that was definitely a heart heart moment.

Rating: ★★★☆☆

MOVIE REVIEW: MY BEBE LOVE #KILIGPAMORE (Jose Javier Reyes, 2015)

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My notes on My Bebe Love #KiligPaMore:

1. One of the first few scenes showed Vic Sotto looking at a mirror and combing his eyebrows. This was meant to be funny and it was the type of slapstick comedy that will be used all-throughout the movie. It felt dated (Pinoy comedy has not evolved much?) but still elicited laughs from the audience. A succeeding scene had Joey de Leon referring to Vic’s “Sandata ni Hudas”. Dated and recycled.

2. Aiai delas Alas, on the other hand, played her character really loud and broad (with matching frilly hair, pastel outfits, and purple & green eyeshadow in case it still wasn’t loud enough for the viewers). She kept screaming all of her lines reminding me of my mom whenever I forget to place my clothes in the hamper. I think they would make the perfect BFFs.

3. I was thrown off by the ADHD-style editing with screens flipping and splitting every few minutes. If only it helped the movie’s really slow pacing.

4. The people that will only watch this to see the big screen chemistry slash film debut of the Alden Richards-Maine Mendoza tandem will be very disappointed. The material completely failed them with their love story feeling tacked on for ticket sales. I didn’t feel even one ounce of kilig (something that we overdose on in the Kalyeserye episodes). FYI, they recycled some elements of the Kalyeserye in the movie (the long table joke? Seen and done). I was surprised there was no falling wall to separate the lovebirds. Here’s hoping they will have a good rom-com sa tamang panahon.

5. I think the worst offense of this movie were the endless shoved-in-your-face product placements. Similar to My Little Bossing, it had a mini-commercial shilling Tide for turning clothes sparkly white for only 6 pesos. That bit had no bearing on a previous or succeeding scene. It just had to be inserted because Vic endorsed the said product. One scene even had Alden shopping for Tide in a convenience store. Maybe he missed laundry day?

6. Let’s play the annual Shameless Shilling Name Game: Bear Brand Adult Plus, Glutamax, O+, Phoenix Petroleum, Tide, Goldilocks, McDonald’s, Talk n Text, Solmux, Google, PLDT Home, San Miguel, and Coke. Do I get a perfect score this year?

7. Enough of the hashtags please. Whenever a movie character starts sentences with the word hashtag, a Twitter bird dies and goes to heaven.

8. The best performer in this movie was actually Valeen Montenegro. She looked gorgeous and fit her role well. I hope we see more of her in better roles.

9. Does Alden smoke?

10. That scene where they traversed Daang Hari to go to and from Zambales made me laugh out really loud.

11. To be fair, Vic and Aiai played off each other well and surprisingly delivered the expected kilig (fully supported by the audience reactions). Maybe the film should have focused on this love story instead.

12. Lola Nidora hinted at a possible sequel (highly likely given the long lines at the cinemas). Hashtag fantastic baby. Hashtag groan.

Rating: ★★☆☆☆